even if it leads nowhere.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009 11:27 PM
Do I look like an object where you can blame about everything that happens? Sometimes I wish I was invisible, or perhaps everytime you talk, it becomes my favourite tune I hear over and over again. Whenever I get tired of it, I'll have a remote control with me and press a button to change to a new song. Now, somthing is impossible.. If you could sulk, why can't I? You made me angry, you knew I'll tend to shout or talk rudely. Why bother talking to me still? Or maybe, you don't even know your daughter as well as you think you do huh? Chill, chill. Breathe in and out. Be grateful you're my parents, and like you said. I have to love you, no matter what. Ha, did you know when I said "I love you" that day when you shoot that sentence straight to my face, it came sincerely from the bottom of my heart, no? Too bad. I don't understand why can't you reply something as simple ABC, which is "I love you too" (?) No wonder we could never get along since forever. Whenever we're getting better, you just have to ruin it all. Or was it me? I bet you'd say I wasn't being understanding. No one was there to hear you out, moments you went through alone like you told sometime ago. So, what about myself? Have you even asked how am I doing throughout this years. Were you being understanding. I know, I know you have to handle little brother but when there was sometime for us, like when we accompanied Daddy prawn fishing. We had a solid 2-6hours, you know? You only share things when there's Abang (elder brother). I have to agree, he always listens obidently, but eventhough my tone sounds rude when I talk (I kept telling you, I'm like that. Bad habits die hard) or when I reply something when you're telling me. I still wanna hear and if I could I want to make you feel better, Mummy. My only wish is, I hope one day I have the darn guts to tell you how I feel one day. Remember those letter we used to write to each other Mama?Chin up Shkn, cheer up!Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, now you're saying when I want something I get oh so nice. I'm not a begger you know, mind you. NOW I WISH YOU WOULD JUST SHUTUP OKAY. WILL YOU! you're welcomed to complain to your favourite children, your SONS! Plus, I'm not that kind of kid who get only nice when I want something okay, eff you.i build myself up
and fly around in circles
waiting as my heart drops
and my back begins to tingle
finally could this be it?
like others, I want your attention Mummylove.
